Loss and Gain.

The past few weeks have had some very high highs and very low lows.

Two weeks ago we found out that our good friend has passed away suddenly. I am still trying to wrap my mind around the reality of it all. It came as such a shock and it was such a freak accident that it hasn’t fully sunk in yet (here is the link to the article about him).

I’ve known people who have died before. Friends, family, acquaintances…but this one was different for me. The only other funeral I can remember going to where something of this magnitude had happened was when I was a freshman in high school and a classmate took his own life. I think I understood what had happened only on the very surface. But, I was too young and disconnected from it all to understand the reality of it. Now that I’m older, I get it. Or, at least I am GETTING it. Trying to.

Its hard to believe that Chad isn’t physically in this world anymore. I am heartbroken that he won’t be at our wedding to celebrate our big day with us. His spirit will be there, for sure.

I found out about his death via ap hone call from my friend on Thursday July 19th. I had addressed his and his girlfriend’s Save The Date the previous night. It’s still sitting in the pile waiting to be sent out…I can’t bear the thought of taking it out. There is stays for now.

The good thing to come out of all of this is how much love and appreciation I realized I had for my dear group of friends. I think they can all agree. I hate that it took a death for su all to come together and realize this, but I am so happy that we could be there for each other over the past few weeks, whether it be sitting next to each other or over the phone. Drew and I have always found it frustrating that we live so far away from everyone (ok, we know its not THAT far away, but ask any other cape cod year-rounder who loves to go over the bridge. Go ahead). I hate getting emails or texts saying that people are meeting up on a Wednesday night for Ethiopian food and knowing that we aren’t able to go with everyone. However, we are going to try harder now. The love that has come out of this situation is absolutely staggering and I want to spread it around as much as I can.

Whats the “high” of this past week? We. Are. Officially. Homeowners. We have a house. Like, to live in. And its ours. Last Thursday morning, July 26th2012, we passed papers and got our keys. We are beyond excited and terrified at the same time. We have a long road of fixing and projects ahead of us, but it will be worth it. I will be happy when the manual labor ends because it’s the WORST. The ladies I work with gave us a bottle of champagne and a gurgling cod pitcher (Cape house- gotta have one!). Because of  Chad’s funeral, Drew working overtime, and friend time-spending, we didn’t have time to be at the house together until this past Monday evening. After ripping up carpets and pulling staples out of the stairs for 2 hours, Drew and I sat on our back porch and passed the champagne bottle back and forth. I can’t wait to make the house our home.